- Martian Manhunter: Arrrrgh! Fire! Run through town like a mad man!
- Wonder Woman: Arrrrrgh! Cheetah! Ataaaaack!
- Flash: Arrrgh! Bomb on my writst! Ruuuuuun!
- Batman: Arrrrrgh! Stuck in a coffin! Punch my way out!
- Green Lantern: Arrrgh! I am a failure in life. Let me...sit here and mope.
- Superman: ...*dying*
- Me: ...Seriously Superman?
There is a game with Badman, Wonder Women, Superman, Green Lantern and Flash. Guess who isn’t there. Right. Spiderman. First The Avengers and now that. Nobody wants Spiderman
With the exception of Batman, film adaptions of DC Comics heroes are pretty much a mess right now. Green Lantern bombed, Superman is in the hands of the guy that directed Sucker Punch, and Wonder Woman couldn’t even get picked up as a series on NBC (which is barely a network anymore).
Marvel, in contrast, clearly has its act together. But that wasn’t always the case. Sure, the Spider-man and X-Men movies were pretty successful, but during that time period they also put out the two Fantastic Four movies, Daredevil, Ghost Rider, and X-Men Origins: Wolverine.
It’s so easy to imagine a world where Warner Brothers isn’t completely brainless and a slew of successful DC projects culminated this summer with a Justice League movie.
Here’s how I imagine that timeline going:
After the success of a film version of third tier hero Black Lightning (starring Wesley Snipes), Warner Brothers turns a little known DC Comics property called Doom Patrol into a movie. This story of super powered misfits led by a man in a wheelchair strikes a chord with the millennial moviegoing public and sets the stage for Warner Brothers’ future success.
They would film Alex Ross’ Kingdom Come. Yeah, it’s not part of the main canon arc. What is? Who cares? It would surely be a better movie than whatever horror they plan on inflicting on us. (Yeah, I’m bitter.)